Resilient leadership in the toughest times — What are the signs that warn you your resilience may be ebbing away?

Some find themselves avoiding difficult things, and obsessing about little things, like tidying their desk, or loading the dishwasher in a particular way, or making endless lists about everything. Many get trapped into working ever longer hours to less effect or trying to tackle several challenges simultaneously and finishing none of them.

There can be a tendency to ruminate pointlessly over what might have been. Some people noticed themselves being preoccupied with things they could have done differently. They kept replaying an incident or encounter in their mind when it was too late to do anything about it, and they should have been focusing their energies on the present and future. Others kept beating themselves up for weak-willed behaviours, which made them feel worse.

The triggers that disrupt our resilience take many different forms. They vary depending on our personalities and life circumstances but tend to fall in the following categories where people reported:

· engulfed by a crisis, whether at work or in personal life

· overwhelmed by the pressures of everyday life, at work and at home

· stuck with a situation or problem and unable to see the way forward

· inadequate and letting others down

· out of control of what’s going on

· trapped by perfectionism in themselves or others

· compromised in their personal values

· distressed by someone else’s behaviours

· unappreciated and undervalued by others

· frustrated by the organisation, and unable to influence events

· an unrelenting expectation about ‘e-presenteeism’

· bored and unfulfilled

· a toxic combination of several of the above.

It can be helpful to reflect on:

· what triggers most disrupt your equilibrium?

· how best do you handle these triggers in the moment?

Key is knowing yourself and your anchors. For some what anchors them is a sense of professional calling or life purpose. For others it is a strong cultural or religious rooting that has given them a defined sense of self- worth and commitment to make a difference in the world. Many leaders talked about what matters in the ‘great scheme of things’ and what and who they care most about.

It can help to re-evaluate periodically what is motivating you and then reshape your priorities in the light of the changing motivations. What motivates can be linked to what others, in or outside of work, see as your strengths and gifts.

Periodic feedback and encouragement from friends, colleagues and family is a constant source of reassessing and reaffirming motivation and reminding yourself what anchors you.

It can be helpful to reflect on:

· what anchors and motivates you?

· what are recent helpful insights about yourself?