Leading Through Frustration: Recognise That You Need to be in the Right Frame of Mind Before You Can Act Well

Handling frustrations effectively requires being in the right frame of mind with you not being preoccupied with your emotional reactions

In my book, ‘100 Handling Rapid Change Ideas’, my starting point is that you cannot handle rapid change well unless you are in the right frame of mind. I suggest that key ingredients in bringing the right frame of mind involve recognising why you are in a particular leadership situation, understanding the expectations of others, being ready to be your own barometer of progress, recognising and accepting the risks and accepting the inevitability of surprises and shocks.

Leading well through frustration also involves bringing objectivity and detachment enabling you to be focused and measured at the same time. You need to be deliberate in your actions based on as much clarity as possible about the opportunities and risks. Seeking to be clear-headed does not mean predicting every eventuality: you have to be ready for the unexpected and be conscious about how you handle ongoing uncertainty. The more you have a frame of reference for your actions and are able to articulate to yourself and others why you are taking particular action, the greater the likelihood of progress in addressing and moving on from frustration.

Getting into the right frame of mind will involve understanding and managing your emotions, avoiding getting over tired, recognising how you will manage stress and keeping your personal energy recharged, especially in a period when frustration may increase rather than diminish.

Hazel recognised that she could get irritated by her Chair and some of her senior team who could be ponderous. Hazel knew that in order to have a productive conversation with her Chair she needed to set her expectations reasonably low about progress that could be made. She reminded herself that she needed to begin such conversations in a frame of mind where she was ready to listen to the Chair as she always made good points, even though they were often clouded with nostalgia.

Hazel accepted that she needed to be patient and persistent with her senior team and not allow herself to become frustrated by their natural conservatism. Hazel recognised that her team would consider evidence carefully, which reinforced in Hazel the importance of using measured evidence rather than rhetoric when she was seeking to persuade them to be more adventurous in their approach.

In practice

• Know what helps you move your frame of mind into a focused and measured approach, able to deal with potential frustration
• Align your expectations with how best you handle particularly individuals and people so that the chances of success are enhanced, and of disappointment are reduced
• Be alert to how your frame of mind will respond to risks, surprises and shocks
• Be mindful about when anxiety or stress can disrupt your frame of mind

An extract from ‘100 Great Leading Through Frustration Ideas’ written by Peter Shaw and published by Marshall Cavendish in 2019.

Next week we will look at recognising when you have been able to take forward positive steps.